Would you let this faculty teach your children? - The Daily Prophet, Halloween Edition

The Hogwarts Halloween party was a blast. Muggles and the creme de la creme of wizarding society mixed freely as a Dementor served drinks at the bar; Tonks zapped the unsuspecting with her light-up wand; and someone even brought the portrait of Mrs. Black, who spent her evening screaming at 'filthy mudbloods and Muggles'. What a great time.

Mad-Eye Moody showed up with Rita - who ever thought the wizarding world would have seen a combination like that? We've heard that the Dementor in residence is in fact secretly romantically involved with Luna Lovegood - can you imagine that relationship? What fodder for future Prophet pages!. Mrs. Molly Weasley showed up on Hagrid's arm, so I guess all isn't going well for Mr. Weasley over at the Ministry. Harry and Hermione showed up together, so I guess Ron's out of the picture for now. Those poor Weasley boys, unlucky in love! Narcissa Malfoy and Remus also seem to be coupling - go figure! Tonks seemed remarkably okay, showing up in the company of the Sorting Hat - or maybe Tonks has just been pushed off the deep end.

Sometime during the evening, the Dark Mark appeared on an unsuspecting gourd - I personally lay the blame at Professor Snape's door. I mean, that whole horrible Dumbledore business went unmentioned that night, but we all have our suspicions.

I'm sure more news will be following from this gathering - stay posted!