It's My Pity Party, and I'll Cry if I Want To...

So I've jumped off the bridge and begun the resignation process. By next week, neither of us will be working and I'll have only one more paycheck to come. To say I'm terrified is putting it mildly, but it's better than wanting to get hit by a car on the way to work. Looks like I'll be putting in some temp time.

How the hell did we get here?

So I dealt with it in the best way I could last night, and ate a shitload of Halloween candy. Today I'm back on track, and trying to just wrap it up here and make some plans for the very uncertain future. I'm praying for the Deux Ex Machina to show up, but something tells me it may show up late if at all, so we're on our own.

Can't let the kids know anything is wrong.

I can temp. I will keep doing reader reports as long as they send them to me. I'll keep sending out my resume. Maybe this latest recruiter can get something for Mike.

I'm caught between wanting to just lose it and go on a screaming tear and just being very calm, detached to the point of being dead. I feel so exhausted and worn out, I just don't know how to react anymore.