Tuesday, July 22, 2008

I was meaning to blog this earlier, but was sidetracked by the excitement yesterday.

TO EVERYONE IN GRAND CENTRAL STATION AT 9 A.M. ON WEEKDAYS:

- The lady walking with the bloody shin? (that would be me yesterday) Obviously not having a good morning. Clear a path to the coffee counter for her.

- That sound you hear as I pass by is Anthrax and Public Enemy. Not exactly Yanni. It reflects the mood. Get out of the way.

- Tourists, this one's for you - A.M. rush hour in Manhattan is precisely the WORST possible time, along with 5 P.M. rush hour, to be taking photos in Grand Central Station. What in the hell are you awake and in Grand Central for at this hour, anyway? You're on vacation. Go back to bed, or find a breakfast buffet and stay the hell out of my way.

- The urge to clothesline people coming at you full speed is tremendous, especially when you're undercaffeinated and very hot and drippy. And bleeding. So before you Westchester and Connecticut commuters think about charging me en masse, think hard.

4 comments:

P said...

we need to obviously prepare a pamphlet for these poor fools which includes the native tourist (you know who I mean, the Long Islanders and Queens people who never venture into the city) - surprised one hasn't been created yet actually.

Stacey said...

eg, watermelon

Anonymous said...

"Do not be in Grand Central at certain time in the morning and 5pm".
Got it. Wrote it down. will keep that in mind in October. :D

Knitting it Out in an Urban Zoo said...

Yes. And, perhaps a slightly different version for the Chicago tourist sect.